1 00:00:10,890 --> 00:00:16,970 Oh, thanks to you, these things I do. 2 00:00:19,430 --> 00:00:21,830 Because of you. 3 00:00:23,570 --> 00:00:25,970 Because of you. 4 00:00:26,630 --> 00:00:27,680 Whoa. 5 00:00:30,510 --> 00:00:32,310 Whoa, yeah. 6 00:00:36,190 --> 00:00:38,030 You're not taking that? 7 00:00:38,330 --> 00:00:40,270 Like my golfing trophy. 8 00:00:40,271 --> 00:00:44,669 He took on all comments on the pattern green of butlings to win that. That was 9 00:00:44,670 --> 00:00:45,720 ten years ago. 10 00:00:46,010 --> 00:00:47,210 I haven't used it since. 11 00:00:47,630 --> 00:00:48,680 I have. Yeah? 12 00:00:49,150 --> 00:00:51,860 You unblocked the drainpipe with it that Christmas? 13 00:00:51,861 --> 00:00:56,389 Anyway, moving to Reigate, there'll be much more opportunity for me to play 14 00:00:56,390 --> 00:00:58,010 golf. What, with one club? 15 00:00:58,470 --> 00:01:01,150 I should be getting some more in the fullness of time. 16 00:01:01,390 --> 00:01:04,340 You could be denying him a future Ryder Cup glory, you know. 17 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,530 There goes the last of Eric's pornographic books. 18 00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:13,690 Right, what's next? 19 00:01:14,100 --> 00:01:16,570 Just the kids' toys, but we'll do those tomorrow. 20 00:01:16,860 --> 00:01:18,120 Oh, it's funny, isn't it? 21 00:01:18,340 --> 00:01:20,000 You and him moving to Reigate. 22 00:01:20,660 --> 00:01:22,820 Veronica going to Sicily with Marcello. 23 00:01:23,780 --> 00:01:27,210 It's as though the whole fabric of Motsburg Park is breaking up, eh? 24 00:01:28,400 --> 00:01:29,450 Time moves on. 25 00:01:30,060 --> 00:01:32,710 That's very profound, that, Jean. Wish I'd said that. 26 00:01:32,980 --> 00:01:34,030 Not for you, though. 27 00:01:34,640 --> 00:01:37,890 You'll still be left in Motsburg Park when everyone else is gone. 28 00:01:38,540 --> 00:01:41,370 It'll be like one of those old western ghost towns, then. 29 00:01:42,060 --> 00:01:44,600 Balls of sagebrush blowing down the high street. 30 00:01:45,380 --> 00:01:50,079 Shutters banging in the wind. And just one old -timer sitting in his rocking 31 00:01:50,080 --> 00:01:51,960 chair in front of Elmo's wine bar. 32 00:01:53,140 --> 00:01:54,300 I've got me plans. 33 00:01:54,740 --> 00:01:57,860 Yeah, well, I hope they include finding a flat and a job. 34 00:01:58,180 --> 00:02:02,479 Course Reigate will be heavily industrialised by then. There'll be a 35 00:02:02,480 --> 00:02:04,650 of sulphurous pong hanging over the place. 36 00:02:04,940 --> 00:02:08,039 All the golf courses will have been dug up to make wafer. 37 00:02:08,460 --> 00:02:09,510 For new factories. 38 00:02:09,699 --> 00:02:12,469 And, of course, the poor old women left their own world. 39 00:02:12,540 --> 00:02:13,590 What plan? 40 00:02:13,591 --> 00:02:15,359 I met this bloke the other night. 41 00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:18,719 He's thinking of starting a theme park. What are you going to do? Walk about 42 00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:20,100 dressed up as Mickey Mouse? 43 00:02:20,820 --> 00:02:22,870 No, I'll be starting at ground level, me. 44 00:02:23,040 --> 00:02:26,940 With the ten pounds from your building society as your share of the capital, 45 00:02:27,140 --> 00:02:28,190 presumably. 46 00:02:28,300 --> 00:02:30,530 See, your problem is, Jean, you think small. 47 00:02:30,780 --> 00:02:32,890 Now, you forget I had my own business once. 48 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:36,390 Yeah, and that went bust because you went walkabout to Cairo. 49 00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:40,610 Of course, you could always ask for your old job back in that bar there. 50 00:02:40,700 --> 00:02:42,620 Get paid in boxes to date. 51 00:02:42,980 --> 00:02:44,030 Very nice. 52 00:02:44,520 --> 00:02:46,500 What happened to my fez, incidentally? 53 00:02:46,580 --> 00:02:49,050 Oh, the kids have been using it in their sandpits. 54 00:02:49,540 --> 00:02:50,590 Very nice. 55 00:02:51,140 --> 00:02:53,440 No worse than having your putter thrown away. 56 00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:56,730 Nah, that could be worth a lot of money in a few years' time. 57 00:02:57,120 --> 00:02:58,620 Yeah, it only needs a clean -up. 58 00:02:58,621 --> 00:03:02,569 I was going to buy you some golf balls last Christmas, you know. 59 00:03:02,570 --> 00:03:04,489 You've changed your subject, haven't you? 60 00:03:04,490 --> 00:03:07,200 You should be worrying about your breadwinner, Jean. 61 00:03:07,201 --> 00:03:11,069 Even if you do let him take his putter, he's hardly likely to walk straight into 62 00:03:11,070 --> 00:03:12,510 a job as assistant pro, is he? 63 00:03:12,950 --> 00:03:16,450 Unlike some people, he's done something. 64 00:03:16,451 --> 00:03:20,529 Yeah. Got an interview with a painter and decorator on Monday, as a matter of 65 00:03:20,530 --> 00:03:21,770 fact. Have you? 66 00:03:22,890 --> 00:03:23,940 Oh, well done. 67 00:03:24,270 --> 00:03:26,980 Whilst you were giving a very good impression of Nero. 68 00:03:28,410 --> 00:03:29,550 I'll make a cup of tea. 69 00:03:31,790 --> 00:03:34,170 And you can leave that on the sofa as well. 70 00:03:39,490 --> 00:03:40,540 Tea's up. 71 00:03:46,270 --> 00:03:47,650 How's the inventory going? 72 00:03:47,651 --> 00:03:50,329 It's a bit like going through somebody's belongings. 73 00:03:50,330 --> 00:03:51,380 Well, it is. 74 00:03:51,510 --> 00:03:53,430 It all belongs to Mr Phillips now. 75 00:03:53,710 --> 00:03:56,240 He and Mrs Bainbridge exchanged contracts today. 76 00:03:57,110 --> 00:03:58,970 That's another bit of the fabric gone. 77 00:03:59,510 --> 00:04:01,190 Bainbridge is becoming Phillips. 78 00:04:01,520 --> 00:04:03,020 Doesn't sound right, does it? 79 00:04:03,420 --> 00:04:05,710 A bit like Harrods becoming Comet Warehouse. 80 00:04:07,420 --> 00:04:08,920 Would you all come in, please? 81 00:04:10,100 --> 00:04:13,530 Shall we take our tea in? No, leave it here. It can't get worse, can it? 82 00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:16,450 Oh, thanks, Sandra. 83 00:04:19,420 --> 00:04:22,300 Well, I'm not going to sell. 84 00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:25,420 I can't go after Cicely leaving you all out of work. 85 00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:27,680 Oh, Mrs Bainbridge! 86 00:04:28,720 --> 00:04:29,770 Oh! 87 00:04:30,641 --> 00:04:32,629 Be my guest. 88 00:04:32,630 --> 00:04:33,680 Oh, right. 89 00:04:35,690 --> 00:04:37,470 It's so kind, Mrs Bainbridge. 90 00:04:37,471 --> 00:04:39,569 Are you sure you're doing the right thing? 91 00:04:39,570 --> 00:04:41,130 Will you wait outside, Sandra? 92 00:04:41,890 --> 00:04:44,650 Are you? Yeah, I'll be able to sleep at night this way. 93 00:04:44,950 --> 00:04:46,090 What did Marcello say? 94 00:04:46,250 --> 00:04:48,210 Marcello? About you jilting him for us. 95 00:04:48,530 --> 00:04:49,730 Don't push your luck. 96 00:04:50,230 --> 00:04:53,729 No, it'd be nice to have a business here, my own six penny worth. But who 97 00:04:53,730 --> 00:04:55,149 run it for you, Mrs Bainbridge? 98 00:04:55,150 --> 00:04:57,789 Oh, I haven't thought about that yet, Sandra. I've only just put the phone 99 00:04:57,790 --> 00:04:58,729 on Mr Phillips. 100 00:04:58,730 --> 00:05:02,849 Listen, Mrs Bainbridge, I'm deeply grateful, but I still feel a bit red 101 00:05:02,850 --> 00:05:03,930 kissing you like that. 102 00:05:04,090 --> 00:05:05,350 I like you, Eric. 103 00:05:05,790 --> 00:05:06,840 So does he. 104 00:05:06,841 --> 00:05:10,369 All these years people have thought it's me, but we go to a job, I say, hello, 105 00:05:10,370 --> 00:05:13,500 Mrs Smith, can I start the painting? Not him, he's straight in. 106 00:05:14,110 --> 00:05:18,109 And I've never felt safe alone in the office with him. Clear off, the lot of 107 00:05:18,110 --> 00:05:19,670 you. I've got some thinking to do. 108 00:05:22,730 --> 00:05:23,810 You know what gets me? 109 00:05:24,610 --> 00:05:25,810 You're gorgeous with it. 110 00:05:29,130 --> 00:05:31,420 Oh, that's a weight off my shoulders, that is. 111 00:05:31,590 --> 00:05:32,770 She's so kind. 112 00:05:33,410 --> 00:05:34,670 Fancy thinking of her. 113 00:05:34,671 --> 00:05:38,909 Marcello had better behave himself in Sicily, you know. Otherwise I'll go 114 00:05:38,910 --> 00:05:41,080 straight over there and squash his grapes. 115 00:05:42,730 --> 00:05:43,780 Here's to Veronica. 116 00:05:43,990 --> 00:05:45,040 To Veronica. 117 00:05:47,770 --> 00:05:49,750 Something occurring to you, Eric? 118 00:05:50,610 --> 00:05:52,410 Well, yeah, it is, as a matter of fact. 119 00:05:52,610 --> 00:05:55,230 I mean, I am the foreman painter, after all. 120 00:05:55,231 --> 00:05:59,039 You're measuring yourself for Veronica's chair, aren't you? 121 00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:01,270 Well, let's face it, I am the obvious choice. 122 00:06:01,340 --> 00:06:02,390 Who says? 123 00:06:02,600 --> 00:06:03,650 I do. 124 00:06:03,651 --> 00:06:07,219 Well, Veronica doesn't. You don't seriously think she'd ask you to manage 125 00:06:07,220 --> 00:06:08,099 place, do you? 126 00:06:08,100 --> 00:06:11,579 That's all right, Eric, don't worry, I'd still keep you on. Yeah, and I'd keep 127 00:06:11,580 --> 00:06:13,920 you on, provided... Provided what? 128 00:06:16,480 --> 00:06:17,530 What are you doing? 129 00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:19,460 Oh, just measuring the door. 130 00:06:19,461 --> 00:06:22,279 Make sure you can both get your heads through it. 131 00:06:22,280 --> 00:06:24,520 It's not a matter of conceit, Sandra. 132 00:06:24,521 --> 00:06:27,699 No, it's a matter of pure fantasy, as far as you're concerned. 133 00:06:27,700 --> 00:06:31,380 Oh, stop it, the pair of you. I can't stand you being so presumptuous. 134 00:06:31,840 --> 00:06:33,640 Aren't you overlooking something? 135 00:06:34,100 --> 00:06:36,260 It's as plain as the nose on your face. 136 00:06:36,620 --> 00:06:39,450 Veronica will obviously bring in someone from outside. 137 00:06:41,220 --> 00:06:42,660 I've never liked you, Sandra. 138 00:06:43,220 --> 00:06:44,270 Neither have I. 139 00:06:46,460 --> 00:06:48,810 Yes, well, of course, I'm very pleased for you. 140 00:06:48,830 --> 00:06:51,030 Your mother is a very exceptional woman. 141 00:06:51,370 --> 00:06:53,230 It's all right. Don't keep on about her. 142 00:06:53,231 --> 00:06:55,029 It's the first time I've mentioned her. 143 00:06:55,030 --> 00:06:58,820 And sooner or later, Leslie, you'll realise she's marrying a very nice man. 144 00:06:59,110 --> 00:07:00,310 Possibly. Pardon? 145 00:07:00,650 --> 00:07:02,170 I said possibly. 146 00:07:02,171 --> 00:07:08,229 She's getting positively flowery, isn't she? I think she's missing her mum 147 00:07:08,230 --> 00:07:09,280 already. 148 00:07:11,910 --> 00:07:12,960 It's a vote! 149 00:07:15,331 --> 00:07:18,909 Oh, it is, Eric. Look, it's a boat, yes. 150 00:07:18,910 --> 00:07:20,629 Yeah, it's got sails and everything. 151 00:07:20,630 --> 00:07:22,370 And I have hired it. 152 00:07:22,710 --> 00:07:23,760 Gordon Bennett? 153 00:07:23,970 --> 00:07:28,609 You're not going to sell that on your own, are you? It comes with a crew, plus 154 00:07:28,610 --> 00:07:31,790 chef who's going to make up something with my name on it. 155 00:07:32,270 --> 00:07:34,410 Spinach Elmo, or something like that. 156 00:07:35,090 --> 00:07:36,410 Where are you going, Elmo? 157 00:07:36,590 --> 00:07:37,670 Ramsgate? Margate? 158 00:07:37,910 --> 00:07:41,130 The Med, mate. That's short for the Mediterranean. 159 00:07:42,550 --> 00:07:43,870 Well, I'm flabber. 160 00:07:44,240 --> 00:07:45,800 It's short for flabbergasting. 161 00:07:46,000 --> 00:07:48,620 I thought you would be. Well, what do you reckon? 162 00:07:49,080 --> 00:07:51,960 Well, I think if you've got it, you should flaunt it. 163 00:07:52,180 --> 00:07:56,240 And you haven't heard the best bit. The Fabulous Five are coming as well. 164 00:07:56,620 --> 00:07:58,060 What, the Enid Blyton crowd? 165 00:07:58,520 --> 00:07:59,570 No! 166 00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:03,340 Susie, Jane, Emma, Gemma and Nancy. 167 00:08:03,780 --> 00:08:04,830 Who are they? 168 00:08:04,910 --> 00:08:08,949 He pulled them at the casino the other night. Yeah, I did, didn't I? Yes, you 169 00:08:08,950 --> 00:08:09,889 did, Elmo. 170 00:08:09,890 --> 00:08:13,429 Look, I don't want to sound like a wet blanket. I know you took them all to 171 00:08:13,430 --> 00:08:17,809 supper the other night, but had they all actually signed up for this nautical 172 00:08:17,810 --> 00:08:22,430 adventure? Falling over themselves, super trippy, brill, things like that. 173 00:08:23,850 --> 00:08:26,860 He's taking a girl for a roll on the serpentine, doesn't he? 174 00:08:27,070 --> 00:08:28,450 When did his odyssey begin? 175 00:08:28,770 --> 00:08:31,750 Friday. That's a bit precipitous, isn't it? What? 176 00:08:32,690 --> 00:08:33,740 Quick. 177 00:08:33,859 --> 00:08:37,520 Take the bull by the tail, that's my motto from now on. 178 00:08:37,720 --> 00:08:42,280 All I've got to do is get kitted out for sea, and it's yo -ho -ho. 179 00:08:42,281 --> 00:08:45,479 You going to wear a patch and a cutlass down your trousers? 180 00:08:45,480 --> 00:08:50,279 No, I am not. I'm going to get a few cricket blazers and cricket flannels, 181 00:08:50,280 --> 00:08:53,280 I'm going to get this cat with gold braid round it. 182 00:08:53,640 --> 00:08:57,780 Do you think I ought to have my name picked out in gold thread? Elmo, you 183 00:08:57,781 --> 00:08:58,459 won't it? 184 00:08:58,460 --> 00:09:01,120 Nah, I think everyone will know who he is, don't you? 185 00:09:01,640 --> 00:09:02,800 Of course they will. 186 00:09:03,690 --> 00:09:07,430 I think I'll have my wardrobe designed by that bloke who did my dress suit. 187 00:09:07,650 --> 00:09:10,990 You saw how I looked to you now, didn't you? We did, we did. 188 00:09:11,410 --> 00:09:14,010 I think I'll give you the bell now. Get him started. 189 00:09:15,070 --> 00:09:16,120 Avast, lads. 190 00:09:16,790 --> 00:09:17,840 Avast, Elmo. 191 00:09:21,270 --> 00:09:23,410 Of course, mind -boggling, isn't it? 192 00:09:24,390 --> 00:09:26,110 Elmo loose in the Mediterranean. 193 00:09:26,690 --> 00:09:29,100 Could do wonders for international relations. 194 00:09:30,030 --> 00:09:31,830 Have another bit of the fabric gone? 195 00:09:32,530 --> 00:09:34,350 Motsburg Park without Elmo Putney? 196 00:09:34,770 --> 00:09:37,690 Be a bit like Victorian England without Jack the Ripper. 197 00:09:38,650 --> 00:09:40,270 He's only going for a month or two. 198 00:09:40,271 --> 00:09:42,309 Yeah, but you haven't seen The Fabulous Five. 199 00:09:42,310 --> 00:09:45,769 He could sail round the world three times and still not even think to look 200 00:09:45,770 --> 00:09:48,390 calendar. Oh, I wouldn't change places with him. 201 00:09:48,610 --> 00:09:49,870 No, neither would I, Eric. 202 00:09:50,270 --> 00:09:52,800 Now I've still got me job, I think I'll just plod on. 203 00:09:52,801 --> 00:09:56,009 You might have got your job back, but you still haven't done anything about 204 00:09:56,010 --> 00:09:57,060 finding a flat. 205 00:09:57,061 --> 00:09:59,449 We're moving Saturday, in case you've forgotten. 206 00:09:59,450 --> 00:10:01,570 I know, I've just been biding me time. 207 00:10:02,040 --> 00:10:05,950 Now I know my financial position, I can get the grips with the property market. 208 00:10:05,980 --> 00:10:07,540 You've just been putting it off. 209 00:10:08,200 --> 00:10:09,250 All right, I have. 210 00:10:09,600 --> 00:10:11,160 You can't afford a bar, you know. 211 00:10:11,620 --> 00:10:12,670 I know. 212 00:10:12,780 --> 00:10:13,830 I'm going to rent. 213 00:10:13,831 --> 00:10:17,119 Blimey, O 'Reilly, Eric, there must be hundreds of places you can rent round 214 00:10:17,120 --> 00:10:18,800 here. Just a matter of choosing one. 215 00:10:19,420 --> 00:10:20,470 Hmm. 216 00:10:20,840 --> 00:10:23,010 You sounded like Jean when you'd done that. 217 00:10:23,300 --> 00:10:25,500 Hmm. You look like her, then. 218 00:10:27,600 --> 00:10:29,500 Right, I've made a decision. 219 00:10:30,220 --> 00:10:33,110 You're going to adopt us all and take us to Sicily with you. 220 00:10:33,320 --> 00:10:36,420 A decision about who is going to manage Bainbridge's. 221 00:10:36,980 --> 00:10:40,659 I haven't come to it lightly because each of you has qualities that I've 222 00:10:40,660 --> 00:10:41,710 great store by. 223 00:10:41,711 --> 00:10:45,379 It was a matter of choosing the one with the best combination of those 224 00:10:45,380 --> 00:10:49,720 qualities. The one I really think can run the whole shooting match for me. 225 00:10:50,380 --> 00:10:51,430 It's you, Sandra. 226 00:10:52,640 --> 00:10:54,300 Me? Bainbridge? Yes. 227 00:10:55,080 --> 00:10:56,300 Do you think I'm up to it? 228 00:10:56,301 --> 00:11:00,049 Because I would really love to be up to it. I would love the opportunity. 229 00:11:00,050 --> 00:11:01,370 Then take the opportunity. 230 00:11:02,270 --> 00:11:03,490 Thanks, Mrs Bainbridge. 231 00:11:04,030 --> 00:11:05,090 Well done, Dondra. 232 00:11:05,510 --> 00:11:06,560 No hard feelings. 233 00:11:06,561 --> 00:11:10,509 And I want you to know that I shall have no reservations about working for a 234 00:11:10,510 --> 00:11:13,509 woman. Well, could you? You've been working for me long enough. 235 00:11:13,510 --> 00:11:14,560 Oh, yeah. 236 00:11:16,270 --> 00:11:17,320 Jackal. 237 00:11:17,530 --> 00:11:18,630 Well done, Titch. 238 00:11:20,650 --> 00:11:24,569 Right. Sandra, get your stuff in here. There's precious little time to get you 239 00:11:24,570 --> 00:11:26,560 used to this side of the desk before I go. 240 00:11:26,570 --> 00:11:27,620 Yes, of course. 241 00:11:27,910 --> 00:11:30,020 Everything will look the other way round. 242 00:11:31,030 --> 00:11:32,490 Hold on a moment, Jacko. 243 00:11:32,850 --> 00:11:37,430 Listen, Eric, I've called you a cuddly toy in the past. 244 00:11:38,290 --> 00:11:39,340 I see. 245 00:11:39,970 --> 00:11:43,450 For you more than that, I want you to be Sandra's strong right arm. 246 00:11:44,790 --> 00:11:46,350 I'll do my best, Mrs Bainbridge. 247 00:11:47,770 --> 00:11:49,820 Would you want me to be her left earlobe? 248 00:11:51,950 --> 00:11:55,740 really put out, are you? Well, I'm not exactly doing cartwheels, Veronica. 249 00:11:56,070 --> 00:11:57,450 Would you have picked you? 250 00:11:58,690 --> 00:12:01,870 I did run my own business once. Yes, into the ground. 251 00:12:02,170 --> 00:12:03,370 That was circumstances. 252 00:12:03,610 --> 00:12:05,470 Yeah, you disappearing for six weeks. 253 00:12:05,990 --> 00:12:07,930 You're a Peter Pan, Jacko. 254 00:12:08,130 --> 00:12:11,560 So far as taking responsibility is concerned, you haven't grown up. 255 00:12:12,450 --> 00:12:15,400 Well, I could sit behind the desk so me nappy wouldn't show. 256 00:12:15,690 --> 00:12:18,580 Come on, I couldn't have given you this job and you know it. 257 00:12:18,790 --> 00:12:19,840 No, I suppose not. 258 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:21,860 Did I come second? No, third. 259 00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:25,000 I walked into that one, didn't I? 260 00:12:25,001 --> 00:12:28,779 And you let Sandra settle in before you start to give her the sort of cheek 261 00:12:28,780 --> 00:12:29,830 you've given me. 262 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,230 It's not in my nature to be cheeky, Veronica. 263 00:12:32,440 --> 00:12:34,910 I only did it to you because I thought you liked it. 264 00:12:35,620 --> 00:12:36,860 I shall miss you. 265 00:12:37,520 --> 00:12:38,700 I shall miss you too. 266 00:12:39,480 --> 00:12:43,359 Here, do you remember when you were going through an especially bad patch 267 00:12:43,360 --> 00:12:45,710 Lionel and we were thinking of having a fling? 268 00:12:46,580 --> 00:12:48,660 I still go red just thinking about it. 269 00:12:49,450 --> 00:12:50,670 I'm glad we never flung. 270 00:12:52,290 --> 00:12:54,810 Why? I'm not good enough for you, Veronica. 271 00:12:55,890 --> 00:12:59,620 That's been borne out by the fact I only came third in the management state. 272 00:13:08,350 --> 00:13:10,650 Well, uh, it's time we should go home. 273 00:13:11,110 --> 00:13:12,160 Yes, I suppose it is. 274 00:13:13,570 --> 00:13:17,890 Well, Leslie... Can I... come to the wedding? 275 00:13:19,599 --> 00:13:23,880 Oh, Leslie, you do find it so hard, don't you? 276 00:13:25,560 --> 00:13:27,240 Now the wedding will be complete. 277 00:13:28,360 --> 00:13:30,200 I'm sorry I've been such a fit. 278 00:13:32,680 --> 00:13:34,620 I shall try to make your mama happy. 279 00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:36,140 I know you will. 280 00:13:39,020 --> 00:13:40,070 Goodbye, Mummy. 281 00:13:41,540 --> 00:13:43,180 I don't know how you put up with me. 282 00:13:44,060 --> 00:13:48,860 Perhaps at the moment like this, I must be the most horrible self. 283 00:13:49,860 --> 00:13:51,900 Not too much contrition in one day. 284 00:13:52,940 --> 00:13:53,990 Bye. 285 00:13:54,340 --> 00:13:55,390 Bye. 286 00:14:15,200 --> 00:14:16,250 What's that, Eric? 287 00:14:17,060 --> 00:14:18,240 That, um... 288 00:14:18,460 --> 00:14:20,500 Oh, that's the carpet sweeper. Oh. 289 00:14:20,671 --> 00:14:28,439 Funny how they make them shape like golf clubs these days, don't they? Look, it 290 00:14:28,440 --> 00:14:31,540 doesn't take up a lot of room. I'm nostalgic about it. 291 00:14:31,960 --> 00:14:33,240 Oh, go on, then. 292 00:14:33,500 --> 00:14:36,150 You'd smuggle it down there somehow. I know you would. 293 00:14:37,460 --> 00:14:42,660 Oh, go on, Jean. Let him take his putter. He's taking it. He's taking it. 294 00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:46,490 He didn't object to you taking that awful plastic bust of Cliff Richard. 295 00:14:46,860 --> 00:14:49,690 That Robin Spottiswood gave you on your 14th birthday? 296 00:14:49,980 --> 00:14:53,320 No, well... What plastic buster, Cliff Richard? 297 00:14:53,920 --> 00:14:55,460 Well, it's just a little thing. 298 00:14:56,140 --> 00:14:57,190 It's horrible. 299 00:14:57,420 --> 00:14:59,280 Why haven't you thrown it away, then? 300 00:14:59,620 --> 00:15:01,740 This is you who's died, this, isn't it? 301 00:15:03,821 --> 00:15:06,619 Where have you been, anyway? 302 00:15:06,620 --> 00:15:08,220 Down the electricity showroom. 303 00:15:08,221 --> 00:15:11,939 Why? Well, I want to get one of those cardboard boxes, you know, the big ones 304 00:15:11,940 --> 00:15:13,479 that the washing machines come in. 305 00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:15,160 Got to live somewhere, haven't I? 306 00:15:15,980 --> 00:15:17,060 Finding out, are you? 307 00:15:17,061 --> 00:15:18,979 Well, you should have warned me. 308 00:15:18,980 --> 00:15:21,780 Well, we have been on and on and on to you about it. 309 00:15:21,781 --> 00:15:24,759 Yeah, but you didn't tell me how much it was going to cost to rent a place, did 310 00:15:24,760 --> 00:15:28,310 you? If you'd have bothered to look in the papers, you'd have found out. 311 00:15:28,320 --> 00:15:30,620 It's going to take half me wages to rent a slum. 312 00:15:30,940 --> 00:15:33,400 And there's food and social life to think of. 313 00:15:33,401 --> 00:15:35,659 You'll have to choose then, won't you? 314 00:15:35,660 --> 00:15:37,950 We could do with losing a bit of weight anyway. 315 00:15:38,700 --> 00:15:42,010 The sympathy in this place is like being wrapped in a warm blanket. 316 00:15:42,260 --> 00:15:44,060 Have you actually looked anywhere? 317 00:15:44,939 --> 00:15:46,460 Record might be a better word. 318 00:15:46,700 --> 00:15:49,540 Last place I looked at, the bed comes out of the wall. 319 00:15:49,800 --> 00:15:52,750 I hardly touch it, a big bit of plaster come out the ceiling. 320 00:15:52,751 --> 00:15:56,699 The bathroom's three flights down on the landing, you've got to share it. 321 00:15:56,700 --> 00:16:00,119 And the cooker was like something that'd come out of the Crimean War. 322 00:16:00,120 --> 00:16:01,170 Sounds awful. 323 00:16:01,400 --> 00:16:02,560 That was the best place. 324 00:16:02,561 --> 00:16:07,239 Well, why not put more of your wages towards getting a place that's halfway 325 00:16:07,240 --> 00:16:11,199 decent? I don't want a place that's halfway decent, Jean. I want somewhere 326 00:16:11,200 --> 00:16:12,250 that's a bit stylish. 327 00:16:12,830 --> 00:16:14,630 Big picture windows, nice view. 328 00:16:15,250 --> 00:16:18,849 So that when you lure some poor unsuspecting female through the door, 329 00:16:18,850 --> 00:16:20,630 say, oh, what a lovely flat. 330 00:16:20,870 --> 00:16:22,950 I'd love to stay here for a few days. 331 00:16:23,550 --> 00:16:25,660 Might have been part of me thinking, yeah. 332 00:16:25,990 --> 00:16:27,410 It's cold outside. 333 00:16:31,170 --> 00:16:33,460 You doing the weather forecast now, are you? 334 00:16:34,250 --> 00:16:35,730 No, I mean life. 335 00:16:36,190 --> 00:16:38,300 You see, life doesn't have a personality. 336 00:16:38,630 --> 00:16:40,030 It's utterly cold. 337 00:16:40,860 --> 00:16:43,060 It's up to every man to light his own fire. 338 00:16:43,061 --> 00:16:45,979 You should have been a hospital visitor, Eric. 339 00:16:45,980 --> 00:16:47,840 You'd have emptied the beds in no time. 340 00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:51,790 I shall probably have a little cry tomorrow. 341 00:16:52,520 --> 00:16:55,650 No good you trying to get round me by telling me that you love me. 342 00:16:56,260 --> 00:16:58,960 No, I mean saying goodbye to the house. 343 00:16:58,961 --> 00:17:03,579 Nears me thinking I was going to save up for a year to come and visit you in 344 00:17:03,580 --> 00:17:04,630 Reigate. 345 00:17:04,631 --> 00:17:07,399 I shall probably start taking the Daily Telegraph. 346 00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:09,819 Why? Well, I'll be a commuter, won't I? 347 00:17:10,099 --> 00:17:11,200 Oh, blimey. 348 00:17:11,201 --> 00:17:15,019 There's him thinking about what paper he's going to buy and I'll be lying on 349 00:17:15,020 --> 00:17:16,100 embankment under one. 350 00:17:16,101 --> 00:17:20,559 Do you remember when you fell through the conservatory roof? 351 00:17:20,560 --> 00:17:24,019 I was not showing off to the girl next door, no matter what anybody says. 352 00:17:24,020 --> 00:17:26,200 You didn't have a single cut on you. 353 00:17:26,579 --> 00:17:28,259 There wasn't any glass in the roof. 354 00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:29,450 Yes, there was. 355 00:17:30,220 --> 00:17:31,270 Oh, yeah. 356 00:17:32,340 --> 00:17:33,390 I'll get by. 357 00:17:33,720 --> 00:17:35,680 Albeit in reduced circumstances. 358 00:17:36,730 --> 00:17:37,780 Right, that does it. 359 00:17:39,990 --> 00:17:41,710 The putter is not going. 360 00:17:41,910 --> 00:17:45,410 No, no, no, put it back. It is going over the garden wall, Jack. Hello, 361 00:17:48,921 --> 00:17:50,949 Leslie. 362 00:17:50,950 --> 00:17:52,030 These are for you. 363 00:17:52,590 --> 00:17:53,640 For me? Why? 364 00:17:53,750 --> 00:17:58,389 Well, I thought you'd be a bit sad with your mum gone. I know I was when me mum 365 00:17:58,390 --> 00:17:59,440 ran off with me dad. 366 00:18:02,990 --> 00:18:05,770 Well, yeah, evidently I was a noisy child. 367 00:18:06,250 --> 00:18:08,330 But still, that's in the past. 368 00:18:08,710 --> 00:18:13,170 Anyway, this is to cheer you up. That's very kind. What is it? Open it, open it. 369 00:18:16,410 --> 00:18:17,550 They're night dresses. 370 00:18:17,670 --> 00:18:19,250 Yeah, novelty ones. 371 00:18:19,490 --> 00:18:22,020 There's seven of them, one for each day of the week. 372 00:18:22,021 --> 00:18:25,349 I can see that. They've got the days of the week embroidered on them. Clever, 373 00:18:25,350 --> 00:18:26,009 isn't it? 374 00:18:26,010 --> 00:18:27,060 Do you like them? 375 00:18:27,130 --> 00:18:28,410 Yes. Thank you. 376 00:18:28,650 --> 00:18:32,750 That's all right. And now for the cherry on top of the cake. 377 00:18:32,751 --> 00:18:34,909 You haven't bought me anything else to wear. 378 00:18:34,910 --> 00:18:41,089 No, I'm talking careers now. You see, I'll go afloat today and I need someone 379 00:18:41,090 --> 00:18:42,750 manage the place while I'm gone. 380 00:18:42,970 --> 00:18:46,490 And, wait for it, here it comes. 381 00:18:47,510 --> 00:18:48,560 It's you! 382 00:18:50,010 --> 00:18:51,310 Obviously. Oh. 383 00:18:51,311 --> 00:18:55,409 You're hardly going to find anybody else at the 11th hour, are you? 384 00:18:55,410 --> 00:18:57,270 Well, I thought you'd be overwhelmed. 385 00:18:57,390 --> 00:18:58,890 And I'll do it on one condition. 386 00:18:59,050 --> 00:19:01,850 Condition? This conversation's going all wrong. 387 00:19:02,210 --> 00:19:03,260 What condition? 388 00:19:03,261 --> 00:19:06,729 That I have a free hand to turn this place into what it should be. Oh, no, 389 00:19:06,730 --> 00:19:11,290 are not turning it into a disco. Those flashing lights make me fall over. 390 00:19:11,570 --> 00:19:12,690 Not a disco. 391 00:19:12,910 --> 00:19:14,110 A wine bar. 392 00:19:14,470 --> 00:19:16,070 Well, it already is. 393 00:19:16,330 --> 00:19:21,010 I mean one that attracts customers. You want to take my pink away, don't you? 394 00:19:21,420 --> 00:19:22,740 That's the first thing I do. 395 00:19:22,760 --> 00:19:25,340 But that's what singles the whole place out. 396 00:19:25,940 --> 00:19:27,500 Exactly. Look, give me a chance. 397 00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:30,460 I've got a lot of ideas. I know I could make it work. 398 00:19:30,980 --> 00:19:34,899 And if it's not a success by the time you get back... I can change it back to 399 00:19:34,900 --> 00:19:35,859 pink again. 400 00:19:35,860 --> 00:19:41,260 Yeah. Well, I am having me upstairs completely re -gutted and done. 401 00:19:42,270 --> 00:19:44,070 I might as well go for the old shebang. 402 00:19:44,370 --> 00:19:45,470 You won't regret it. 403 00:19:45,690 --> 00:19:50,429 There's just one thing. You are not to change the name. It stays as Elmo 404 00:19:50,430 --> 00:19:54,610 Putney's Wine Bar, cos I thought that one up meself. Oh, all right. 405 00:19:56,750 --> 00:19:57,800 Hello, Admiral. 406 00:19:58,130 --> 00:19:59,190 Ready to set sail? 407 00:19:59,390 --> 00:20:01,550 Yeah. And I'll tell you why. 408 00:20:01,910 --> 00:20:03,290 You've got to ask me why. 409 00:20:03,610 --> 00:20:04,660 Oh. 410 00:20:04,830 --> 00:20:05,880 Why? 411 00:20:10,150 --> 00:20:11,200 Because... Yeah? 412 00:20:18,270 --> 00:20:22,479 Yeah? Did you think of that one yourself? 413 00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:23,600 I did, I did. 414 00:20:23,601 --> 00:20:28,319 Well, you're going to have the fabulous five in stitches, you are, Elmo. Yeah, 415 00:20:28,320 --> 00:20:31,090 I'm getting ever so excited. They'll be here in a minute. 416 00:20:32,620 --> 00:20:34,360 How does my garb grab you? 417 00:20:34,780 --> 00:20:36,680 You look a real sea dog, Elmo. 418 00:20:37,360 --> 00:20:38,410 Hello, Leslie. 419 00:20:38,500 --> 00:20:39,820 What's in the box? Nothing. 420 00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:41,330 Nothing? 421 00:20:41,680 --> 00:20:44,270 Well, we only popped in to wish you bon voyage, Elmo. 422 00:20:44,410 --> 00:20:48,470 That's very nice of you. Eric and Jean popped in earlier. They go tomorrow, 423 00:20:48,590 --> 00:20:49,810 don't they? Yeah, I know. 424 00:20:50,090 --> 00:20:54,869 And then Veronica and Marcello popped in yesterday before they went. She gave me 425 00:20:54,870 --> 00:20:55,970 a peck on the cheek. 426 00:20:56,170 --> 00:21:02,989 And Marcello said... He said, um... Bini Fortunata. Something like that. It was 427 00:21:02,990 --> 00:21:04,970 in Italian, but I know he meant well. 428 00:21:06,630 --> 00:21:09,890 Yeah, yeah. I hear you've come up in the world. 429 00:21:10,130 --> 00:21:12,170 Yes, I'm tomorrow's woman, Elmo. 430 00:21:12,730 --> 00:21:15,020 And I'm tomorrow's woman's underling, Elmo. 431 00:21:15,021 --> 00:21:16,749 You've started, haven't you? 432 00:21:16,750 --> 00:21:20,329 No, I haven't. Always bow to you and call you madam when I come in the 433 00:21:20,330 --> 00:21:22,560 shouldn't do it when I'm making up the wages. 434 00:21:22,670 --> 00:21:26,869 You can see which way this is going, can't you? No offence, Sandra, but a 435 00:21:26,870 --> 00:21:31,689 business brain like mine would have chosen Jacko. Well, you know how women 436 00:21:31,690 --> 00:21:33,070 together? Quite. 437 00:21:33,071 --> 00:21:37,249 I've still got my job, even though it is hanging by a thread. With me holding 438 00:21:37,250 --> 00:21:38,300 the scissors. 439 00:21:38,570 --> 00:21:40,990 Tyrant. How's the flat hunting going? 440 00:21:40,991 --> 00:21:43,169 Oh, I haven't got enough ammunition, Elmo. 441 00:21:43,170 --> 00:21:46,489 Looks as though I'm going to end up living in a converted rabbit hutch. Oh, 442 00:21:46,490 --> 00:21:47,540 dear. 443 00:21:47,610 --> 00:21:48,660 Here, just a minute. 444 00:21:48,661 --> 00:21:52,069 You offered me one of your rooms not long ago, do you remember? 445 00:21:52,070 --> 00:21:56,970 Oh, mate, if only you'd said yes at the time. I'm having it completely gutted. 446 00:21:57,370 --> 00:22:00,430 I'm having it redone as an ocean liner at sea. 447 00:22:00,431 --> 00:22:05,249 You're going through quite a nautical phase at the moment, aren't you, Elmo? 448 00:22:05,250 --> 00:22:06,410 Yeah, I wonder why. 449 00:22:06,870 --> 00:22:07,920 Who knows? 450 00:22:08,570 --> 00:22:09,620 Yeah. 451 00:22:09,900 --> 00:22:13,819 You're not having your windows turned into portholes, are you? How did you 452 00:22:13,820 --> 00:22:14,819 that? 453 00:22:14,820 --> 00:22:15,870 Wild guess. 454 00:22:15,980 --> 00:22:20,199 And I'll make a wild guess that you'll have the ship's rail painted halfway up 455 00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:22,080 your walls with the sea behind it. 456 00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:25,160 And the golden sun setting on the horizon. 457 00:22:25,500 --> 00:22:28,150 I bet you'll have your kitchen done as a ship's gully. 458 00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:29,860 And hammocks in the bedroom. 459 00:22:30,320 --> 00:22:32,120 You two are uncanny. 460 00:22:32,820 --> 00:22:38,080 So you've read my mind. The only thing you've missed out are the seagulls. 461 00:22:41,439 --> 00:22:42,940 Not flying about indoors? 462 00:22:43,420 --> 00:22:47,220 No, no, I've got a 24 -hour recording of it to make it authentic. 463 00:22:48,140 --> 00:22:49,190 I've got to see this. 464 00:22:49,500 --> 00:22:50,550 I've got to hear this. 465 00:22:55,020 --> 00:22:57,040 Hello, shipmates. 466 00:22:57,280 --> 00:22:58,330 Hello. 467 00:22:59,120 --> 00:23:03,599 Here. We're ready when you are. Right, take the keys, stow your gear in the 468 00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:05,580 Cadillac, and I'll be right with you. 469 00:23:11,340 --> 00:23:12,540 Where did you find them? 470 00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:13,650 On a table. 471 00:23:15,220 --> 00:23:16,280 At the casino. 472 00:23:16,860 --> 00:23:17,910 Oh. 473 00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:19,610 Leslie! 474 00:23:19,880 --> 00:23:20,930 I'm off now. 475 00:23:21,780 --> 00:23:23,040 Don't go without your cap. 476 00:23:23,240 --> 00:23:25,360 Oh, no, this tops me off, this does. 477 00:23:26,700 --> 00:23:30,250 I'm pleased to see you resisted the temptation to have your name on it, 478 00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:33,000 I couldn't in the end. I mean, I am Elmo, aren't I? 479 00:23:33,200 --> 00:23:34,250 The one and only. 480 00:23:35,640 --> 00:23:36,690 Ta -ra, Leslie. 481 00:23:36,900 --> 00:23:38,960 See you in a few weeks or months. 482 00:23:39,860 --> 00:23:45,920 Goodbye. Have a... Have a... Not every time, but did you have in mind? 483 00:23:46,200 --> 00:23:50,299 Hey, listen, when you have the place redone, promise me you won't make it too 484 00:23:50,300 --> 00:23:51,800 gaudy. I'll do my best. 485 00:23:52,680 --> 00:23:53,730 Cheers, Sandra. 486 00:23:54,920 --> 00:23:55,970 Bye, Elmo. 487 00:23:56,540 --> 00:23:57,980 I'll look forward to the book. 488 00:24:14,700 --> 00:24:16,870 Don't sing anymore. I'll get all emotional. 489 00:24:17,040 --> 00:24:18,090 Ta -da! 490 00:24:19,660 --> 00:24:22,280 I still can't get over his shit, mate. 491 00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:23,920 They just like a winner. 492 00:24:25,340 --> 00:24:26,390 Elmo! 493 00:24:29,260 --> 00:24:30,340 Elmo! Elmo! 494 00:24:30,540 --> 00:24:31,720 No, no, don't! 495 00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:33,530 No! 496 00:24:34,520 --> 00:24:35,570 Filet, girls! 497 00:24:37,020 --> 00:24:38,070 What, what? 498 00:24:38,180 --> 00:24:39,230 Oh, yeah, look. 499 00:24:39,340 --> 00:24:43,760 I was responsible for all this, wasn't I? And I am eternally grateful. 500 00:24:44,270 --> 00:24:50,129 Yeah, but what I want you to realise is these girls, whatever they are, they 501 00:24:50,130 --> 00:24:52,150 like a man who's a winner. 502 00:24:52,830 --> 00:24:53,880 Got money. 503 00:24:54,610 --> 00:24:55,660 Like you, Elmo. 504 00:24:56,070 --> 00:24:57,120 Yeah? 505 00:24:57,530 --> 00:25:02,350 Well, I don't want you to mistake it for... Love, 506 00:25:03,290 --> 00:25:08,170 Elmo. I know the score. I have matured. Oh, good. 507 00:25:08,850 --> 00:25:12,750 Yeah, you see, I'm at the stage you were at years ago. 508 00:25:13,290 --> 00:25:18,210 Only you're rich with it. Yeah. See, I've got all your life ahead of me. 509 00:25:21,590 --> 00:25:22,710 Deeply envious, Elmo. 510 00:25:23,550 --> 00:25:24,600 Good luck, mate. 511 00:25:25,110 --> 00:25:30,370 See you, Jacko. The sun has finally come out for Elmo Putney. 512 00:25:54,960 --> 00:25:58,939 It's funny to think that we've ended up as, well, successful businesswomen, I 513 00:25:58,940 --> 00:26:00,020 suppose you'd call us. 514 00:26:00,160 --> 00:26:01,540 Yes, I suppose we are. 515 00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:03,490 Funny, isn't it? 516 00:26:03,880 --> 00:26:06,040 Everybody's moved on, or moved up. 517 00:26:06,360 --> 00:26:07,640 All except Jacko. 518 00:26:07,641 --> 00:26:11,139 Yes, he still doesn't seem to have any idea where he's going. 519 00:26:11,140 --> 00:26:14,580 He just cruises along, unreliable and cheerful. 520 00:26:14,960 --> 00:26:17,320 Yeah. Part of his attraction, I suppose. 521 00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:19,680 Do you still fancy him? 522 00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:21,610 Me? 523 00:26:22,120 --> 00:26:23,170 No, we're just mates. 524 00:26:24,330 --> 00:26:25,380 Do you? 525 00:26:26,190 --> 00:26:27,240 No. 526 00:26:28,070 --> 00:26:29,750 I'll get something to go with this. 527 00:26:32,610 --> 00:26:33,810 What was all that about? 528 00:26:34,510 --> 00:26:35,950 He's forgotten he's made wet. 529 00:26:36,450 --> 00:26:39,100 No, he hasn't. He's got five of them sitting in the car. 530 00:26:40,390 --> 00:26:43,230 I wonder if there's any opals left in Australia to find. 531 00:26:46,070 --> 00:26:47,120 Hello? 532 00:26:47,510 --> 00:26:50,270 Listen, Jackal, about this flat business. 533 00:26:51,139 --> 00:26:55,320 If you really can't find anywhere decent... Jacko, it's for you. 534 00:26:57,520 --> 00:26:58,570 Excuse me, sir. 535 00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:03,650 Hello? 536 00:27:03,900 --> 00:27:04,950 Oh, hello, Rick. 537 00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:08,060 No, I didn't throw it over the garden wall. 538 00:27:09,220 --> 00:27:10,660 I left it behind the dustbins. 539 00:27:11,940 --> 00:27:12,990 And you. 540 00:27:17,120 --> 00:27:18,170 Jacko? Yeah? 541 00:27:18,430 --> 00:27:21,560 I don't like the thought of you having to live somewhere awful. 542 00:27:21,650 --> 00:27:22,700 Don't you, Leslie? 543 00:27:22,930 --> 00:27:25,340 I'll be quite lonely in that house all by myself. 544 00:27:25,570 --> 00:27:26,620 Oh, Leslie. 545 00:27:36,690 --> 00:27:37,740 Excuse me, sir. 546 00:28:14,120 --> 00:28:20,200 Because of you, because of you, 547 00:28:20,360 --> 00:28:25,040 because of you, 548 00:28:25,060 --> 00:28:31,439 because of you, oh, oh, 549 00:28:31,440 --> 00:28:38,279 and you love nature, you love 550 00:28:38,280 --> 00:28:39,329 nature. 551 00:28:39,330 --> 00:28:43,880 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0